Standing at the edge
A few thoughts on what it's like to stand at the edge.
I've had a few (very much needed) days to relax in Maine and take care of the less pressing but still important producer-type tasks around the show. After firing on all cylinders for about a month just trying to keep the wheels turning, it is a real blessing to just take a few deep breaths and get some sleep. I also had some time to do some thinking about where I am personally with the show, my career and those other important things that you're supposed to put in a blog. People occasionally tell me I'm too opaque, that I don't share enough about what's going on in my head and heart. Here's my attempt to be a little more open about that stuff. If this isn't really what you're interested in here, feel free to take a romp over to Danielle's costume antics on our first Road to NYMF segment.
I've been on this project for eight (8) years. It started with Rob and my ten minute Satan rant set to music in Greg Pliska's Musical Theatre Collaboration class back at Williams in 2000. By the end of September, we will have put it in front of audiences six times (once at Williams, once in Chicago, four times in New York). Every time we've done it, we've made it a little bigger and a little - OK a probably a lot - better. (It needed a lot of 'better'.) We've taken Paradise Lost - now Sophia's Fall - to absolutely the highest level that I could ever hope to achieve on my own, without a musical theatre producer to put his weight behind it.
I feel like I'm standing on the edge of a tremendous change. I don't know what's over the edge, but I'm going to find out soon; there's an awful inevitability about it. It could be a successful musical, or it could be a mouthful of ashes. The audience could love it or they could utter the ubiquitous "meh" and move on to something else. Now that we're so close, I'm afraid to find out. I wanted this opportunity more than anything - literally, anything - and now that it's so close, I'm coming to grips with the consequences of that wish. Every artist comes to this place at some point, I'm sure, but not as many of us invest so much time, treasure and soul into one piece.
Musical Theatre is a unique and potent art form. Nothing else that I can think of relies on so many people with so many different skills to make it come alive. A painter can show his painting; a 'pure' composer can sit down in front of an audience and play his music on a piano. But musical theatre and opera require the combined skills of dozens, if not hundreds, of people to even have a shot at being real. I can tell you about Sophia's Fall until I'm blue, but it's nothing if you don't sit down in a theatre that's been prepped and built out, in front of actors who've worked for weeks or months to learn their parts, their songs, their dance moves... the list goes on of course. This is why live theatre, and musical theatre especially, should always have a place in our cultural lives. It is by far the most collaborative art form, combining all the other fine arts into a whole that is greater.
So what does this have to do with my own aspirations? That beast of a musical I've been working on since 2000 is in the hands of twenty six other people - twelve actors, four musicians and ten production crew. We'll add a few more as we get closer in to the performance; by the time the curtain goes up on September 18th, there will be around forty people involved in making it live. I trust them, I chose them, and I thought I was prepared to let them take it and own it and make it real. But sitting here in Maine, looking at the calendar, I realize I am not prepared, and never will be. In two weeks they will carry Rob and my dream on to stage and hold it up for an audience of hard-bitten New York theatre pros, who will either love it or not, who will be moved or not, who will stand up and shout at the end, or not. Sophia's Fall will have legs, or not, in two weeks. I cannot prepare for that; I can only swallow the fear and do what I can to support them.
Personal drama aside, the show is looking great for where it is in the rehearsal process (when I last saw it, anyway). If anybody can pull it off, it's this group; I have the right team. The last piece of the puzzle is an audience in the door (not so subtle hint: buy tickets!), which, ironically, is actually on my shoulders and under my control to some degree. I'll be papering at the TheatreMania street fair on Sunday, I'll be at the Dance Series press conference on Monday, and I'll be hitting the concierges and coffee shops with postcards and posters starting Thursday.
And in two weeks, we'll find out what New York thinks of Sophia's Fall.
Comments
Re: Standing at the edge
by Nikki Van Cassele
on Sep 7th 2008, 9:54 pm
I agree with Tessa. Everyone will love it! I am thrilled to be a part of something this fantastic!!
Re: Standing at the edge
by Tessa Faye
on Sep 6th 2008, 3:37 pm
Honored to be a part of your piece, Ben! I speak for the entire cast when I say so. New York is gonna love it :)
Re: Standing at the edge
by Anita McCracken
on Sep 6th 2008, 9:08 am
Our niece, Danielle, plays Sophia in Sophia's Fall. We are listening to the music daily and can't wait to see the show. We think it is outstanding and look forward to seeing it on Broadway!
